You Need The Power To Say No

My new post on the Moms 'N Charge blog is all about the power of NO.  


There has been quite a bit of talk about coming from a place of yes. Say yes. The year of yes. Yes to the dress. Whatever, Yes, Yes, Yes. That’s all really fantastic but, sometimes NO is absolutely necessary.

Where is this coming from, you ask? Recently, I was asked if I could do something for someone and my gut reaction was no, but my mouth said SURE! (*eye roll*) I was so annoyed with myself I started talking out loud, to no one in particular (I do that a lot), asking myself and, no one in particular, why the hell I just did that! Sometimes I make myself crazy!! I have my moments, sometimes I say no. If our children ask to go somewhere I think is unsafe, or they want candy for dinner or Pizza for breakfast, I’ll say no! But when it comes to me, even when it affects me, my very state of being, my time, my energy, my personal space in a way that is not positive or productive, more often than not I say yes either literally or with my silent acceptance.

As I have grown more mature in age, I’ve discovered I have a lot less patience for nonsense and I have become in some ways more concerned with self. I am definitely becoming more vocal about what I want and need. I am a perpetual work in progress. So, I must confess to the entire world, I still have this thing where I say yes way too much. I have decided it just needs to stop. Grown people can say no to stuff. I teach our children to say no…say no to anything that does not feel right, say no to anything they do not want to do. Say no. Meanwhile… I am over here like… sigh.

Click here to read my entire post on Moms 'N Charge ...

My Guest Blog Post: #DearBlackGirl You Are More Than A Pretty Young Girl

I am so excited to announce I am one of the new contributors to the Moms 'N Charge community!

Moms 'N Charge was founded by Christine St.Vil, she teaches moms across the country how to feel good without feeling guilty. I met Christine last year at a Fashion show/Fundraiser, Runway Moms for a Cause. Her energy is contagious and I am addicted to her blog!  Needless to say, I was thrilled when she welcomed me as one of the new contributors!   And today... my fist guest post went live!! 

#DearBlackGirl  You Are More Than A Pretty Young Girl

How many times have you referred to a little girl as pretty? I will be the first to admit, I have done it a million times or more, I have even used this seemingly harmless word to describe our own daughters on more than one occasion. It’s the natural thing to do, we complement young ladies on their physical attributes as the default. Girls are pretty, boys however, are most often referred to as smart, funny, ambitious or strong among others. Why do we compliment girls on their physical characteristics but we compliment boys on their personality or skills?

Young girls are bombarded with multiple images of physical beauty every day. Beauty is redefined in their world every moment. This fuels the obsession more and leaves young women objectified by a voyeuristic public arena. There are more than enough studies out there suggesting that these images can and do negatively affect how young girls (and grown women) see themselves.

I want to suggest that the words we use can also have a negative effect on how young girls see themselves. Words are powerful, so we should use words wisely. We should use words to inspire, uplift, transform, and instill confidence. We should use words to empower our young ladies. They should look in the mirror and see beyond the pretty girl.

I’m wondering if we paused for a moment the next time we think about complimenting a young lady on how pretty she is if we instead focused on alternative characteristics. The things we can’t “see” but are not difficult to identify. I wonder if by simply changing the conversation we could encourage our young girls to learn to appreciate all the wonderful qualities they have as human beings. There is not much we can do about the external images and advertisements waiting for our young ladies around every corner. But there is something we can do to help build them up and redirect their attention to something other than pretty....  You can read the entire post by clicking here.

Please share your thoughts in the comments, I would love to hear from you! And remember, sharing is caring so spread the love!  

On the Radio:: Love, Hate, Women & Their Bodies – a Conscious Conversations Café Show

Christine Haynes live on the air at 680 WCBM, Women Talk Live, Conscious Conversations Cafe.

A few weeks ago,   I was a guest on WomenTalk Live on Talk-radio 680 WCBM, with host Ann Quasman.  The topic of discussion... The love/hate relationship women have with their bodies. I shared my personal journey, the struggles, the challenges and how my near tragedy helped me find myself and learn to love myself again.  

If you missed the show, the pod cast is live! When you have a moment, please listen to the show and share your thoughts in the comments below. I would love to hear from you. Do you have a love/hate relationship with your body?  If you have made peace how have you done so? Please share, let's continue the conversation right here! 

 

08/31/13 Love, Hate, Women & Their Bodies – a Conscious Conversations Café Show

Guests:  Susan Bishop, Christy Little Jones & Christine Haynes

Ann Quasman's WomanTalk Live

Talkradio 680 WCBM Baltimore

Link to the WTL podcast archive:

http://womantalklive.com/podcast/love-hate-women-their-bodies-a-conscious-conversations-cafe-show/

Direct link to the mp3:

http://www.wcbmpodcast.com/podcasts/womantalk%208-31-13.mp3

Christine In Progress... On the Radio

 

Tonight I was a guest on WomenTalk Live on Talk-radio 680 WCBM, with host Ann Quasman. The topic of discussion... The love/hate relationship women have with their bodies. I shared my personal journey, the struggles, the challenges and how my near tragedy helped me find myself and learn to love myself again. The podcast will be up next week, I will be sure to post it! 

 

I am excited and humbled as this is just one of many wonderful opportunities presented to me since the launch of my blog, I had no idea the decision to share my deeply personal journey would result in so much support and consequently new opportunities for me to start a new and exciting chapter in my life!

 

 

Susan Bishop, Ann Quasman, Christine Haynes and  Christy Little Jones. WomenTalk Live 

Christine Haynes live on the air at 680 WCBM, Women Talk Live, Conscious Conversations Cafe.